Stories of this Canadian girl's adventures exploring Europe...join me!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

real life

Well, the ‘honeymoon’ phase is over now, and real-life is hitting me over the head like a 2x4. For reasons I did not expect, the language difference is really impacting me. I am missing the freedom, ease and comfort of being able to speak and understand everything…and I actually know German. I cannot imagine what it would be like to move somewhere where I don’t know the language at all.

When I moved from Alberta to Saskatchewan 3 years ago, right away, I got involved in a whole bunch of community activities; the library board, basketball, choir. It was easy and fun; asking questions, finding out information, getting to know people, creating a place for me in a new place. But here, I procrastinate every day, not wanting to speak to any strangers in my broken German. I am scared of sounding stupid, looking stupid, of not being able to express what I mean, of being misunderstood, and of not understanding. So, I haven’t really looked into getting a job. I haven’t really looked into taking conversation German classes. I haven’t really done much. And, I’m not feeling very good about that.

Basically, I have spent the past 6 weeks helping great guy make the new häuschen into a home ( it’s looking and feeling good), cooking, working out, writing and exploring a little bit. But, I really feel like I need to get ‘out there’ and get a life…a German life. I just don’t know what that should look like. What I do know, is that it won’t happen unless I try. I think I'll start tomorrow. Wish me luck.

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